So I’ve been trying to take care of my health, but it feels like every time I do that, there’s some stumbling block hampering my ability to do so. I’ve been getting shots to combat low-testosterone, which was making me feel super tired among other symptoms, but now I am in between jobs which will make it more difficult to pay for the treatments. It really sucks and I’m tired of this realm we’re in constantly throwing curve balls at me. Sometimes it really does feel like you take one step forward to take two backward. I’m starting to think the young brother from South Africa, BenedictineTheTruth, on Youtube is correct about what’s going on in this world. It’s a hell realm and it’s designed to keep you constantly floundering and reaching upward, but never finding anything to grasp onto.
It seems like you always HAVE to be in the midst of some type of worry or hardship. If it’s not your health it’s your career, if it’s not that it’s your transportation/car, if it’s not that there’s some issue with family. It’s never ending and you could say it ends at death, but there’s more and more evidence pointing to that fact that you just get memory wiped and re-incarnated to do it all over again, never seeing or understanding the game at hand. These are things I’ve thought about all my life, not just from watching Youtubers or reading Dolores Cannon books. I really hope humanity figures out the plot afoot in this earth realm we reside in, because we are doomed to repeat the same shit over and over again if we don’t!
I would love to be oblivious to things like other people are, but I always have that monkey on my back reminding me of the things I’ve seen/heard and have an understanding of. I can’t get sucked into the MLB Baseball season with the knowledge that the Roman Empire invented “the games” to distract the mass populace from what’s really going on in the world and that our sports today serve a similar purpose. I like baseball, but I can’t enjoy it fully knowing what it really is at the end of the day. Ignorance is bliss like Cypher said in The Matrix, but I think I’d rather be a thinker than a sheep. I’d rather see the shot coming for me than to get popped without ever seeing the shooter stick his arm out the window.
I really hope one day that we get an explanation for why life is so hard on us. Why are we learning that people have lived previous lives, only to come back and live another without any prior wisdom or knowledge from the previous one. How does that not keep you from making the same mistakes over and over again as you incarnate in this place? I know there’s a GOD, but I don’t get his methods. Maybe it’s not for me to get. But hopefully, things will get better in life for myself and other’s so that life isn’t such a struggle all the time. Anyway, keep rockin’ and keep your head up. L8r….